Stephanie Watches Twin Peaks: Season 3 Part 16


    No knock. No doorbell.

    BobCoper and Richard follow one of the two sets of coordinates BobCooper has received and drive there together. BobCooper received two matching coordinates and one different one, so he’s testing the two that match first — and using Richard as his guinea pig. While they don’t speak, I assume they had some road trip bonding time before the serious business happened.

    Jerry has also emerged from the woods. “People? Dear god!” He’s having a hard time getting those binoculars to work — turn ’em around, buddy!

    BobCooper assumes the coordinate spot is on top of a rock and commands Richard to check it out because “I’m 25 years your senior.” Thanks, BobCooper, that’s my new excuse for not wanting to do something. Richard follows the coordinates sensor on top of the rock. Once he’s found the spot, he gets electrocuted and vaporized into a little firework explosion. “Oh. Goodbye, my son.” Good riddance to bad garbage.

    So, those coordinates were a trap and we get the confirmation that BobCooper is indeed Richard’s father, which confirms an awful suspicion we all had about how Richard was conceived. Ugh, poor Audrey.

    BobCooper texts “: – ) ALL” to an unknown recipient…

    Las Vegas

    Chantal and Hutch arrive on Dougie’s block, waiting for him to get home so they can take him out. But the Las Vegas FBI arrive looking for him too. Unfortunately for those looking for him — but fortunately for the Joneses — Dougie is in a coma after sticking that fork in the electrical socket. Chantal and Hutch continue snacking while some of the FBI heads to Lucky 7 Insurance to find him and incompetent Wilson remains behind to watch Dougie’s house.

    Janey-E, Sonny Jim, and Bushnell sit at his bedside while the Mitchum Brothers (and Candie, Sandie, and Mandie) arrive to bring treats and flowers for Dougie. Besides bringing food for them at the hospital, they offer to stock Dougie’s house full of treats.

    …Meanwhile, Gordon Cole is listening to machines beeping and whirring in his hotel room. Perhaps his hearing aids give him a different sort of enhancement than we thought all along…

    Chantal is cranky because she’s on her last bag of snacks and she hasn’t tortured anyone in a while. “It’s the last fucking bag, Hutch!” They watch as the Mitchum Brothers & Co. pull up in a stretch limo and bring a ton of boxes into Dougie’s house. “It’s like a fucking circus parade.” Cue the conga line!

    Another car pulls up and a man gets out, demanding that Chantal and Hutch move because they’re in his driveway. They refuse to move. “I move car,” he decides. So, he rams into their van and tries to push it back. Chantal gets her gun out and shoots at him. But he’s got a G18 machine pistol and shoots her in the shoulder. As they attempt to drive away, he unloads on them. Chantal and Hutch are annihilated inside the van. A fitting Tarantino end for these Tarantino actors. And the FBI does absolutely nothing until it’s all over and arrest him.

    The Mitchum Brothers come out to see what all the fuss is about before collecting the girls and getting the hell out of there. “What the fuck kind of neighborhood is this?”

    TP16_Mitchum Continue reading

    Stephanie Writes: A Summer of (F)unemployment


    I got laid off at the end of May from a job I was at for only a few months, which was unfortunate. Plus, it was a contract position, which meant no unemployment — even more unfortunate. And it was pretty frustrating since it took me about eight months just to find that position. But I took this as an opportunity to try and conquer my long-term career goal: full-time freelance.

    Spoiler alert: this has a positive ending!

    This was great in the beginning because I had a couple things already lined up for the beginning of June, as well as so many people reaching out to help. But as freelancers know, that work ebbs and flows. And once those projects were done, for the rest of summer, everything went into a lull. So, then I felt like I desperately needed to find another full-time content/marketing/writing/editing/something job since freelancing didn’t seem to be working out. Watching your bank account slowly dwindle can be a bit anxiety-inducing. Despite that, these have been the most stress-free months I’ve ever had.

    Day-to-day: My first major goal was to not get sucked into a vampire schedule. In college, whenever I had time off, that meant staying up until 4 am and sleeping until noon. I’ve always naturally been a night owl, but I’ve maintained a pretty good schedule of getting up early and going to bed shortly after midnight. This schedule brought to you by my new best friend: coffee!

    Finding a job or more freelance opportunities became my full-time job. I would scour several different job boards daily and apply to at least five things per day. I even made a portfolio website to try and enhance my chances for work. I’ve had a lot of phone and in-person interviews, met with several recruiters, and networked as best I could in my group of acquaintances as well as through LinkedIn. Chicago seems to be an oversaturated market for content and marketing gigs from what I’ve seen with only entry level positions that pay the bare minimum, positions requiring 50 years of experience, or that pesky nepotism thing scooping up the good gigs. (That’s probably how all job hunting seems, I’m sure.) I also now have the issue of having too much experience and education and wanting a salary I feel I deserve (as well as what the market dictates). This is why I say: I’ve tried LITERALLY everything with very little luck. (In Chris Traeger voice.)

    Besides my daily job hunting, I watched a lot of Netflix, as you do. I watched all of iZombie, the new MST3K, The Defenders, a ton of movies and murder documentaries I’d been wanting to watch, and lots of YouTube videos. I also rewatched Orphan Black (approximately 11 million times), True Blood (only the first 3 seasons, c’mon), Parks & Rec, 30 Rock, and probably a billion other things I’m forgetting.

    I also got back into video games. I finally beat The Wolf Among Us — just in time for them to announce a sequel! Yas! I’ve been attempting to play Mass Effect: Andromeda and Fallout 4 but I’m stuck in both of them. Someone come over and beat these battles for me! Pleeeeease!

    And, of course, I focused on this blog by spending about 4+ hours for every Twin Peaks & Orphan Black review. So, you guys better read those, jeez! Haha.

    Fitness: One of the best things I did for myself this summer was to use a lot of my free time to focus on my fitness and health. I joined a personal training fitness facility called Spindle Fitness. You work with a personal trainer, or programmer, who you discuss your fitness goals with and they tailor a program based on your skills and goals, while slowly upping the intensity over time. It’s all done through an app, so you can go anytime, even when your trainer isn’t there because there will always be someone there to guide you.

    I choose to go when my programmer is there because my schedule allows it and because he’s my only friend now. (Ahahaha, just kidding… sort of.) But I do see him more than anyone else I know and he makes it fun when we’re talking Game of Thrones theories and video games in between deadlift sets. I’ve also noticed quite a lot of progress over the last three months of going about 3 to 4 times per week. And he’s always sharing the progress with me, whether it be just in my form or endurance.

    For example: My floor presses have increased from 7.5 pounds to 17.5 pounds. My deadlifts have increased from 10kg kettlebell to 20kg kettlebell. I’ve also lost 2 inches off my waist and 1 inch off my bust and hips. I’ve also noticed a lot better endurance with general things like planks, battle ropes, rowing machine, jump rope, etc.

    Going there makes me feel like a super duper badass. I love it… and I really never thought I’d say that about working out. I’m very happy with my decision on keeping up with that. And I will continue to do so because it’s actually fun and I like seeing everyone there.

    Friends: While I spent a lot of time with just me, myself, and Sookie (just how I like it), I also used my unlimited availability to spend time with friends. Whether that be more time with friends I see all the time or reconnecting with people I hadn’t seen in a few months. My lovely friend Ali is a freelance artist, so we were able to just go do some random fun things in the middle of the day, such as go to the Shedd Aquarium, the beach with her sister, or to Starved Rock with Bradford.

    Also, I was able to go out of town and not have to worry about taking time off for traveling. So, I went to Indiana for a weekend with friends and Iowa for a weekend with my mom. I also had friends come to town for a weekend filled with Twin Peaks in early June and then, most recently, for the Orphan Black finale. And now, I’m about to go to DragonCon for a week with no worries about taking time off from a job.

    Cosplay: The con crunch for DragonCon didn’t get me this year! I was able to work on my costumes at my leisure. But I was not able to do quite as much as I would have liked because of my lack of funds. But I made do with what I had and put together 3 new costumes for DragonCon. I’m so stoked to wear them!

    And that leads me to now:

    I gave myself until DragonCon to find a job because I am an overly self-sufficient only child who hates asking for money. I’ve had to do a lot of pride swallowing and allowing people to do things for me like buy me drinks or food or a movie ticket. And I super appreciate every friend-sponsored drink, Chinese takeout, or brunch. I actually really enjoy treating my friends or covering the bill so I hate not being able to do that. (Not trying to toot my own horn, that’s just the Leslie Knope in me.)

    I decided that maybe I should look for a part-time gig nearby just to make ends meet until I find something. And then that idea gradually grew more and more attractive to me. I found a place I really wanted to work and, after the really awesome interview, I was really excited about working there. I had a couple days of serious inner turmoil as I chatted with friends, wondering if wanting a chill retail job was some sort of failure after all I’ve accomplished in my career and education. But then my two freelance gigs started popping off again with some ongoing work starting in September. That basically made the decision for me. When it rains, it pours, eh?

    So, when I get back from DragonCon, I will be working at a cute little French pastry and coffee shop nearby while freelance writing and editing for a couple great Chicago companies. I’m really excited about this direction. Since I started my career, I’ve just had a string of bad luck with full-time office jobs (many of my friends can attest to the insanity I’ve experienced) and if my career goal is full-time freelance, as well as my personal project(s) I hope to get off the ground at some point, then I think this is the way to make it happen.

    The problem with having personal projects while working a full-time writing/content/marketing job is that you spend all of your creative energies doing that. As a result, when you get home, you’re mentally exhausted and can’t fathom getting back on the computer to do more work. At least, that’s been my experience in the past. So, having another gig where I’m not staring at a computer screen and, instead, learning about macarons and getting people coffee in a quiet, chill space sounds strangely alluring. I cannot explain it. But maybe you fellow creatives get it.

    Anyway, I’ve babbled on enough. I’m excited about DragonCon (my final unemployed hurrah), and I’m excited to see where this new direction will take me!

    Stephanie Watches Twin Peaks: Season 3 Part 15


    There’s some fear in letting go.

    Nadine is proudly, confidently marching down the street with her golden shovel. She’s finally shoveled her way out of so much shit that she realizes how unfairly she’s treated Ed all these years. How she guilted him into staying with her and giving up his one true love. Granted, Ed could have broken up with her at any time but considering her suicide attempt, he wanted to stand by her.

    Oh, Ed, I want you to be free now… Don’t worry about me. Run to her. Enjoy the rest of your lives together! I am so happy just thinking of you two being happy! Ed, I love you and always will, but true love is giving the other what makes them happy. Jeez, you big lug, how beautiful is this!”

    Ed is clearly skeptical considering this happened before when she had her temporary amnesia and fell in love with Mike. But thanks to Dr. Amp and her new lease on life, she has released Ed to go live his life with Norma, who he really and truly loves after all this time. They share a tearful hug, and Ed rushes to the Double R Diner.

    Norma, everything has changed. I just spoke with Nadine. She’s given me my freedom.”

    Norma is flabbergasted and ready to respond in some way. It’s hard to tell by her expression. And unfortunately, her new beau Walter shows up. Norma apologizes to Ed and goes to sit with him in her booth. Ed resigns himself to sit at the counter, his entire being deflating before out eyes. Shelly gets him a cup of coffee but doesn’t hear his request for the cyanide tablet. At her booth, Norma tells Walter she wants him to buy her out of the diner franchise. She wants to spend more time at home with her family. She decides to keep the Double R for herself and allows Walter to buy her shares of the seven other diners. “I’m happier with just one.” He tells her she’s making a huge mistake but she doesn’t care. She’s made up her mind.

    Ed closes his eyes and realizes he’s, once again, too late again for Norma. He’s missed his chance. Again. But as the music swells, a delicate hand appears on his shoulder. Norma, smiling, spins him around and he smiles.

    Marry me.”
    “Of course I will.”

    They share a passionate kiss, pouring the decades of love they have for each other and missed chances into it. Shelly tearfully watches and represents all of us in this scene because I was crying so hard during this part. It just might be my favorite scene in Twin Peaks. It’s all I ever wanted for Norma and Ed. It’s about time they can finally be together.

    The Convenience Store

    BobCooper arrives at the Convenience Store where we know all the soot men ‘live’. One of them greets him and leads him up an outer staircase. Electricity crackles and they disappear into another dimension/reality/lodge/etc. That familiar flower print pattern lines the walls — and hopefully, you recognize it from Laura’s picture that she received from Mrs. Tremond in FWWM. BobCooper says he’s looking for Phillip Jeffries and one of the soot men pulls a switch. We see the Jumping Man for a split second! Welcome back, buddy! Also, if you look closely, Sarah Palmer’s face is also seen in this flash.

    BobCooper continues on through this house, going up another staircase where Gordon saw all the “dirty, bearded men” lined up. He then emerges outside in front of a motel. You may recognize this as the motel where Leland went to meet Teresa but found her with both Laura and Ronette, so he bolted. He goes to room number 8 and a strange woman offers to unlock the door for him.

    Inside the room, he finds a giant percolator/teapot/bell thing emitting a circular stream of steam. We’ve seen this structure outside the Purple Room and inside the White Lodge (I think it’s the same — my TV is so dark!). Welp, since unfortunately Bowie passed away before he could film his scenes, this is Philip Jeffries now. I think the guy who did his voice did an all right job matching his accent and cadence as well. It didn’t take me out of the fact that it was no longer Bowie. (But damn, how cool would it have been if it was actually him!?) But I still think this works effectively because it’s Twin Peaks and after what we’ve seen in this season already, it’s not all that far-fetched for him to be transformed into this… thing.


    You showed up at FBI headquarters and said you’d met Judy.
    So, you are Cooper?
    Phillip, why didn’t you want to talk about Judy? Who is Judy? Does Judy want something from me?
    Why don’t you ask Judy yourself? Let me write it down for ya.
    Who is Judy?
    You’ve already met Judy?
    What do you mean I’ve met Judy? Who is Judy? Who is Judy?”

    Jeffries-teapot lets out a bunch of steamy numbers — they’re the coordinates that were on Ruth Davenport’s arm. But that’s all he’ll offer. I think it’s reasonable to assume we’ve all met Judy before. It’s possible that Naido is Judy because she’s making strange monkey noises. But I also think Laura Palmer could be Judy. We don’t know what will happen when they all converge at these coordinates, but I just have a feeling that Laura is going to show up in this season as more than just the Black Lodge entity from part 2. We saw the White Lodge release that Laura orb to the world. She must be back in some capacity. Unless she’s just living inside her momma’s head and killing shitty dudes at bars.

    Another interesting theory I’ve come around to is that Judy represents Briggs. That Jeffries called him Judy because his name is Garland Briggs. Judy Garland… Garland Briggs. It could have been a codename to keep his identity secret while working on Blue Rose. There’s even a moment in season 2 where Briggs, coming back from his adventure in the woods, says “Judy Garland.” SO, it’s very possible.

    Jeffries transports BobCooper back to his car, where Richard is waiting for him. He recognizes him from pictures that his mom had — and who is his mom? Oh, yes, Audrey. Just as we all suspected. BobCooper punches and kicks him a bunch, but not enough to kill him. He invites him to get into his truck so they can have some father/son bonding time, I suspect. (If the whole awful Audrey-was-raped scenario is the real one.. and I’m becoming more convinced it is considering Audrey’s mental state.) Before he gets in, he sends a text: “Las Vegas?” Diane received this one a couple episodes ago — more evidence to this crazy out-of-order timeline.

    The convenience store then crackles and whirrs out of existence, much like the TARDIS. Continue reading