Stephanie Wants: Apartment Wishlist

I’m moving July 1st! So, updates might be a little scarce while I pack, move, get Internet, unpack, and get settled in. It’s gonna be a crazy next couple of weeks. In the meantime, if anyone needs some ideas for housewarming presents, here you go. Anything cat or dinosaur themed is clearly the way to go. I need that T-Rex head more than I realized. I could totally hang scarves on him! See? Multi-purpose!

Apartment Wants

Stephanie Cosplays Skye from Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (Season 2)

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Skye — Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Season 2 Version

Cons: C2E2 2015

Status: Active

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I got to wear this costume with my BFFs Nick as Ward and Missy as Simmons. We had an amazing experience running around C2E2 and being super silly. Nick shouted “Hail Hydra” at everyone, including Ming-Na, who could have kicked his ass. And Ming-Na told me, “Oh wow, you have Chloe’s whole outfit!” So that was exciting. And Hayley Atwell told us we were amazing and glared at Nick’s “Hail Hydra.” Also, we ran into Ann Foley, Agents of SHIELD costume designer, who gave us the OFFICIAL seal of approval!

Costume Details:

Most of these items were regular clothes I already had or bought. I also got the SHIELD lanyard from March’s Lootcrate. And my lovely lady friend Dawn made me the cowl hood because she is magical.

Now on to the silly photos we took:

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Stephanie Sees Queen Amarantha by Otherworld Theatre

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I was invited to see Queen Amarantha written by Charles Busch and performed by Otherworld Theatre because of my love for Game of Thrones. Well, specifically because of my love for Cersei. I was promised a story about a young queen, unsure of her own desires, identity, or place in the world, struggling to rule a country riddled with manipulation, betrayal, and death. And Queen Amarantha surely delivered.

The most curious aspect for me was that City Lit Theater is in a church off of Bryn Mawr. And knowing that the play featured sword fighting, partial nudity, AND sexual content (bazinga!), I felt a little scandalous for being there.

But after the quiet plucking of an acoustic guitar to set the mood and hues of reds and blues to light the stage, the audience was instantly transported to this medieval land.

From the get-go, we get the feeling that Amarantha is not like other queens. She was thrust into this role after the untimely death of her father and would much rather go hunting for berries with her flamboyant cousin Roderigo while donning attire not fit for a queen (a.k.a. pants and boots–gasp!). She is also quite fluid with her sexuality, smooching her cute little maid Edra and then falling for the handsome Adrian, equally as fluid with his sexuality.

But her life is not as easy as finding a suitor to be her king. And that’s not even her ultimate goal. She just wants her people to trust, love, and respect her. But she must deal with the theft of the treasury and the growing unrest of her people. When her old pal Thalia comes back into her life, she is initially overjoyed. As are we, the audience, because their friendship seems so innocent, so genuine. But we quickly realize she’s only back to unceremoniously take the throne for herself. While she wishes for no blood to be shed, Amarantha’s advisors are keener to hire assassins. Eventually Amarantha flees the city and leaves the throne in the hands of Roderigo, who takes Thalia for his Queen. What will happen in her absence? And when does all this sword fighting and sexiness come in? Well, you’ll just have to see the play and check it out for yourself, right?

Thalia, Roderigo & Champion

The cast of characters instantly draws you into the story, albeit a little melodramatically at times. But what’s a story of dramatic betrayal without an amazing, evil, maniacal laugh? Props to Thalia played by Mary-Kate Arnold for that! There was also an impressive amount of character development. Roderigo began as a caricature of a lazy, slovenly drunkard, but he quickly took a different turn and grew from his time as King.

My favorite character was obviously Thalia, but I’m biased to those ladies driven mad by paranoia who have spent their entire lives being overlooked. She didn’t want to kill her old best friend. She just wanted to be in power. But power corrupts. Especially those with ill intentions.

And for those that need some eye candy? The character of Adrian ain’t too shabby. Not to mention, the costumes are amazing! I loved the ladies’ armor, especially.

My favorite part was definitely the bar sing-a-long. But I won’t give away anymore than that. Again, go see it while you still can!

Queen Amarantha runs until June 28.

Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays: 7:30 PM
Sundays: 4:00 PM

City Lit Theatre
1020 W Bryn Mawr
Chicago, IL 60660

You can purchase tickets here: http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/826255

Stephanie Watches Game of Thrones: 5×10 “Mother’s Mercy”

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Winterfell

Not very unexpectedly, the majority of Stannis’s army fled during the knight after witnessing their king burn his only child alive. And to make matters worse, Selyse hung herself and Melly Sanders ditches him. But Stannis tries to keep his cool and press on to the battle. The Boltons are too well prepared and take out his army easily.

Stannis fights for his life, but when confronted with Brienne of Tarth, he confesses to the murder of her king, Renly. He tells her to “do your duty” and she slays the shit out of him. Although Stannis is still alive and well in the books, I couldn’t help but be glad that daughter-burning Stannis is no more. Thanks, Brienne buddy.

Meanwhile, Sansa is trying her damnedest to escape while Ramsay is distracted by the battle. But she runs in to Ramsay’s girlfriend and Theon. She would prefer to die while there’s still part of her left than let Ramsay continually take her and destroy her, day after day. But Theon finally steps up his game and pushes that chick off the battlements. KERSPLAT! Thank you, Theon. He and Sansa take each other’s hands and jump off as well. I’m assuming they’ll be okay? Maybe Theon cushioned her landing? Maybe he materialized a big padded bed for them to land on? Who knows.

Braavos

Arya tries out her first “face” as she poses as a prostitute for Ser Meryn Trant. (Okay, so I thought you couldn’t actually get the “faces” until you’d completed your training and it wasn’t just something you tack on, but I digress.) She gets REAL stabby with him. And it was nice to watch that butthole get it after everything he did to the Starks. See, there’s some justice?

But Jaquen is not pleased and punishes her by taking her sight! I was actually cheering for this since it happens in the book, ha ha ha. This is what I’ve come to. Cheering for terrible things when they’re book accurate. But her training will continue and it will be interesting to see her get more attuned to her other senses. Maybe she’ll become Daredevil.

Dorne

Jaime, Myrcella, Trystane, and Bronn head back on their boat to King’s Landing. Jaime and Myrcella have a bonding moment on the boat, where she tells him she knew he was her daddy all along and couldn’t be happier about it. But, of course, all that is ruined when blood starts seeping out of her nose.

Ellaria just couldn’t let them get away so easily. So, she gave Myrcella a poisoned kiss goodbye. Ugh. I don’t think your late hubby, Oberyn, would be too pleased. Remember how he told Cersei, “We don’t hurt little girls in Dorne.” Okay, sure. Whatever.

Across the Narrow Sea

Dany’s crew is all alive, but at a loss as to what to do next. They know they need to go find her, but can’t leave Meereen unattended. Daario and Jorah decide to head out for the most awkward bromance outing (“I’ve loved her for years!” “Yeah, but I totally banged her, dude”) and leave Tyrion, Missandei, and Grey Worm in charge.

We see Daenerys miles and miles from Meereen. Drogon is a sleepy baby and just wants to take a nap after all that killing and eating. Plus, he has some wounds that need to heal, so he’s all, “MOM, LEAVE ME ALONE!” Dany goes off to find food and instead finds a big ass hoard of Dothraki horselords. Nothing bad will come of this, I’m sure!

The Wall

Jon and Sam have some cute bonding time, but Sam begs Jon to let him go to Oldtown with Gilly and baby Sam so he can study to become a maester. They bid farewell and Jon resumes his daily life. Without his one friend, however, things go south quickly. He’s told that his uncle Benjen has been found and a certain wildling has all the information for him. What Jon should have done was have them bring the wildling TO him, but he is grasping so hard at any shred of family that may be left, he rushes out to meet the wildling, only to be greeted with a sign that reads “TRAITOR”.

The men of the Night’s Watch all take turns stabbing him, “For the watch!” Olly, the little kid who killed Ygritte, takes the final blow.

So, the question on everyone’s mind: is Jon Snow really dead?

I have no idea. Jon’s final book chapter left us with a fadeout and no confirmation one way or the other. Kit Harrington did an interview that said he wasn’t coming back and as far as he knew, Jon Snow was dead. That could be very disheartening, or he might not be allowed to really say. But if he really is dead, then what was the point of his story? Why did we go through all of that? Sure, you could say that about any character death, but his death would bring nothing.

And considering the series is called “A Song of Ice & Fire,” that basically means A Song of Jon & Dany, being that they are the last living Targaryens in the Seven Kingdoms.

My theory is that Jon could have warged into Ghost since he is still a Stark and they can do that. Melisandre could bring him back to life since necromancy has been a thing for a while. The Night’s Watch needs to burn his body or he’ll become a wight, but since he is a Targ, maybe he will be “reborn” from the flames like Dany.

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King’s Landing

I’ve been dreading Cersei’s walk of penance for seasons. I knew it would be hard to witness, as it was painful to read. And sure enough, the moment they started cutting off her hair, the tears started flowing.

Cersei is stripped of everything that makes her Cersei Lannister: her golden lion mane of hair, her gorgeous finery, her pride. “But hair grows back,” she tells herself in the book. Instead she emerges from the Sept with her bruised, dirty, bloody body exposed for the world to see. But even still, she holds her head high as she begins the long march to the Red Keep.

I am a lioness, I will not cringe for them.”

The septas chant “SHAME!” behind her as townspeople curse at her and throw things. The uneven pavement bloodies her feet. She falls once and looks as though she may give up as her own tears start flowing. But her resolve strengthens and she gets back up. The march goes on for an excruciatingly long time. And keep in mind, this march is to shame her as a woman for having relations outside of her marital bed, as that is the only crime she confessed to. This is the church’s idea of punishment. Ugh.

By the time Cersei finally reaches the doors of the Red Keep, she is nearly broken. Her uncle Kevan Lannister is there, but it is Qyburn who rushes to her, covers her up, and shows her the newest member of her guard. He looks awfully familiar, doesn’t he? As the newly reborn Mountain swoops Cersei up to take her home, revenge burns hard in her eyes. She will take down those that made her make that long walk and all those that insulted her along the way.

My theory is that Cersei will declare a trial by combat with The Mountain as her fighter. I am more than confident she will win her battle and become the rightful queen once more. I also think that Margaery will lose her trial and be either executed or exiled. Either would be good for Cersei.

And once everything is coming up Cersei, Tommen will die somehow. And then Cersei will just go insane from grief from losing all her children and start to take down King’s Landing with her, or just go insane by herself. Either way, I think this is where Jaime will come in and poison her to death.

So, whew. That was a heavy episode and the hardest for me to witness as a Cersei fan. What are you theories, now that we’re all caught up to the books?

Stephanie Watches Game of Thrones: 5×09 “The Dance of Dragons”

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The Wall

After last week’s fun-filled whitewalker battle, Jon Snow returns to the Wall with what’s left of the Hardhome wildlings. Aliser Thorne has some major second thoughts about letting them all through, but opens the gate anyway. He’s kind of a dick, but knows that he can’t do much against Jon these days except lots of sneering and disapproving glances.

Dorne

Arguably the most tolerable Dorne scenes happened, although much of it was nonsensical. Ellaria magically decides to prostate herself and beg for forgiveness? Doran decides to send his only son and heir (because they are VERY focused on not naming Myrcella queen and heir) to the most dangerous city?

Oh well. At least Dorne is insanely gorgeous and Prince Doran fits the image of him in my head. I want to see Areo Hotah use that big ol’ axe thing. For more than just smashing Bronn in the face. Although that was pretty hilarious. And Jaime clearly found Oberyn’s closet.

Braavos

Arya continues being Lana. Why they couldn’t keep her named Cat of the Canals is beyond me. Did they think viewers were that dumb and wouldn’t get that this Cat is different than Catelyn? Like how they had to change Asha to Yara because they thought people would get her confused with Osha? Anyhoo, Arya spots Mace Tyrell and Ser Meryn Trant getting off a boat to meet with the bank of Braavos. Meryn is on her death list, so her priorities shift from offing this scumbag insurance man to following Meryn and Mace all over the city.

She tracks Meryn to a brothel and watches as he claims all the beautiful women are “too old” until the head of the brothel brings him a little girl to satisfy him. GROSS. You can just see the disgust and rage boiling up in Arya’s eyes. I have a feeling the poison oysters will go for him. That or she’ll unearth Needle and get to him after posing as a brothel girl. That’s my assumption/hope, anyway. This dude needs to go after what he’s done to Sansa.

The North

Davos and Shireen continue being adorable, which just makes what comes next even more terrible and painful. He makes her a little wooden stag to thank her for teaching him how to read. During the night, however, Ramsay sends in some secret soldiers to burn all the food stores and kill the horses. So, Stannis decides to send Davos back to Castle Black to get more and won’t let him take Shireen with him.

And why not? Because Stannis thinks it’s a great idea to burn his cute little daughter at the stake. She has king’s blood running through her veins and her death with APPARENTLY make Stannis win his battles and the war and become king. Stannis just lets this happen. Crazypants Selyse even comes to her senses and tries to stop it. So you know it’s gotta be a cooky decision.

The Game of Thrones producers claim that this is something that will happen later on in the books. But I have to imagine that if Stannis does something this drastic, it will have to be for far more than some burned food and horses. This situation was not dire enough to warrant burning his daughter alive. Granted, nothing would ever be. But still.

Not cool, Stannis.

Meereen

The moment Dany has been dreading has finally arrived. The Meereenese fighting pits have opened and everyone in the city has gathered to witness the meaningless slaughter. Tyrion is equally as disapproving, believing that there’s enough death in the world already. Dany spends much of her time watching with a furrowed brow. And her worry grows even more once Jorah comes on to the battlefield. Part of her is probably like, Ugh not again! And the other, gentler part of her doesn’t want to see her old confidant die brutally on a staged battlefield.

But Jorah bests them all. And after defeting the Meereenese Champsion, the stadium erupts in to insanity. A Harpy has snuck up behind Dany amidst the chaos and is ready to kill her before Jorah throws a spear at him. More Harpies emerge, killing Hizdahr, killing masters, killing everyone in the stadium. Daario, Jorah, and Tyrion fight to protect Dany and Missandei, but it’s no use. There are too many Harpies. They’re surrounded in the middle of the battlefield. Dany clutches Missandei’s hand and closes her eyes, readying herself for death to come.

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But then….

DROGON COMES TO THE RESCUE! Drawn to the stadium by the smell of blood, he chomps and burns those that threaten his mommy. She climbs on top of him and rides out of the stadium in all her Mother of Dragons glory!

I’ve been waiting for this scene all season and thought it was very well done, albeit a bit cheesy with the CGI. I miss edStrong Belwas and the poisoned locusts aspect since I thought Hizdahr was still a jerk, but maybe show!Hizdahr was innocent after all. Also, Jorah totally touched Dany, despite having greyscale. Ummm, was that an accident or intentional? Does Dany have greyscale now? Or was that just something the director totally missed?

Anyway, despite my extreme anger over what happened to Shireen, the Dany scene was really fun. The finale is going to be super intense and emotional. This Cersei fan is not ready!

Stephanie Transforms Her Entire Life

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Hello gentle readers,

Apologies for the lack of updates and very un-timely Game of Thrones reviews. But a lot of craziness happened over the past month and my brain is still adjusting to it all. Various things have been really rough in a not-so-good way for over a year and some of them escalated to major badness the past few months. BUT things are finally coming up Stephanie!

For starters, I got a new job! I now work for a company called Phoenix Media, a company that publishes a number of B2B magazines, as a Senior Content Editor. While I’ll be writing a number of articles for all the various magazines, my main focus will be on Retail Merchandiser. This also means I will gradually be taking over all of its social media and posting (hopefully) daily blog posts and news to the site: retail-merchandiser.com. I know the site is…..well, it’s getting a redesign! Which I spent many hours working on yesterday. So, that’s good! Anyway, I’m going to have a TON of responsibility at this new position and I’m really excited. I’m rounding out my first week and everything has been going super well. It’s nice to feel valued and it’s really great to be writing and editing again.

The other thing happening is that I’m moving to a new apartment at the end of the month because of reasons. No more crazy high-rise with that view. But my cat Sookie and I will enjoy our much bigger, cheaper 1-bedroom apartment. I’m super excited to decorate everything, get some new furniture for my dining room/crafting area, hang up all my prints and my Buffy scythe, and just enjoy some much needed me time.

Stephanie and Sookie against the world! *fist pump*

Thanks for understanding, everyone! I appreciate your patience as I get back on track with life!

<3

 

Stephanie Watches Game of Thrones: 5×07 “The Gift”

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Winterfell

Ramsay continues his torture of Sansa. She tries to get Theon to help her by putting the candle in the highest tower for her, but he goes straight to Ramsay with this plan. As much as Sansa feels betrayed, Theon is merely protecting himself. If he was caught helping Sansa against Ramsay, he would be tortured to the umpteenth degree. And after all that suffering, who can blame him for not wanting more, even after witnessing Sansa’s torture day after day. They’re both stuck in this terrible situation. Why can’t they team up and take down Ramsay already!? Ugh.

But no, Ramsay flays an ally Sansa had in Winterfell and takes her to look at the woman’s body. Probably not as terrible as seeing her father’s head on a spike, but she’s probably just growing more and more desensitized after everything she’s been through.

The Wall

Poor ol’ Aemon Targaeryen died and that was super sad. He should have died on a boat, but WHATEVER, SHOW. When are Sam and Gilly gonna get along with their journey!?

And then Sam and Gilly finally boinked, yay! After he (and Ghost) defended her honor from some scary Night’s Watch guys.

King’s Landing

I knew I should have been worried when I saw Cersei smiling and being happy as she visited the imprisoned Margaery. Okay, I was smiling along with her because it was nice seeing snarky Marg taken down a few pegs. Seeing her gorgeous gowns exchanged for rags, her shiny updo for tangles. Cersei attempts a “peace offering,” which is obviously just her basking in the glow of what she thinks is finally a successful plan.

Cersei goes to gloat about Margaery being imprisoned to the High Sparrow. And when she’s about to leave, he just keeps on talking. My warning bells started ringing. The High Sparrow mentioned that one of his own “unburdened” himself with his past sins. And when Lancel Lannister comes out, we all knew exactly what that unburdening was.

Cersei goes to leave but is stopped and seized, shouting, “I am the Queen!” She’s thrown into a cell, likely beside Margaery, in rags.

I know many viewers are likely celebrating this, but keep this in mind: Cersei was not arrested for her crimes against the Seven Kingdoms or for her part in any past murders or manipulations; she was arrested for having sex outside of her marriage. Her only crime, according to the church, is being promiscuous.

Across the Narrow Sea

Danaerys has been taken to one of the trial fighting pits. And it just so happens that both Jorah and Tyrion have been sold to fight in these pits before they get to fight in the big pit in Meereen. Once Jorah sees that Dany is out there, he goes out and kills all the other combatants. He takes off his helmet to reveal his identity to Dany, begging for her forgiveness. When Tyrion sees that Jorah is about to be brushed off, he escapes his chains (with the assistance of a big guy with an axe–maybe Strong Belwas? Ha, I can only dream) and rushes out to greet the Mother of Dragons.

He proclaims that Jorah has brought him as a gift for her. “I am the gift!”

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Stephanie Watches Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: 2×21&22 “SOS”

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SHIELD was CRAZY in the two-part finale! Shit went DOWN.

As we know from last time, Skye’s mother orchestrated a plot to start a war with SHIELD. She killed Adama, shot herself, then had some of her fellow Inhumans shoot missiles at Afterlife from SHIELD’s quinjet to make everyone, especially Skye, think SHIELD was attacking. Always wanting to see the good in people, Skye believed her mother and even fought back against May! But she still had questions and sought out Raina, of all people, for answers. Her clairvoyance showed her not only Skye’s fate, but her own. So, in a way, Raina sacrificed herself to Jiaying so Skye could witness her true nature and become the true leader of the Inhumans.

With the knowledge of the kind of person her mother really is, the Inhumans kidnap her and lock her up. Great.

Back at the SHIELD base, Cal is getting ready to Hulk out. He took several vials of his Hyde concoction and reveals his plan to Coulson was to kill as many SHIELD agents as possible for his wifeypoo. Unfortunately, he’s taken more than ever before and his heart stops. Jemma jabs him with adrenaline and poof! That was the key ingredient missing from his drug. He transforms into a cro magnon lookin’ dude with giant hands and super strength. He chases FitzSimmons and Coulson through the base, which was super duper hilarious. Although Cal was big and scary, I was laughing my butt off at him chasing everyone around because Kyle Maclachlan is my precious. Finally, Coulson corners him and gets to the heart of the problem: Jiaying.

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Turns out, that Jiaying had been behind his murders and massacres all along. To keep her alive, her brought her people to “feed” on to restore her youth and heal her wounds. After Hydra cut her up and Cal put her back together, she was never the same and required so many lives to go on. Hence the “village massacre” that Cal committed. She spent all her time making Cal do her dirty work and pretending to be the innocent one in all this. He finally changes his tune when he realizes that she could now be corrupting his Daisy. So, he decides to team up with Dad!Coulson and FitzSimmons to save Daisy.

On the other side of the story, Ward and Agent 33 have kidnaped Bobbi. And decided to try their hand at giving manicures. Spoiler alert: they suck! They anesthetize Bobbi’s hands and Ward sticks a bunch of needles through her fingers. Uckkkkkkksdjkhfksdj. (I hate torturey things having to do with fingernails/eyeballs/earballs.) The feeling gradually starts coming back, but Bobbi doesn’t break. Instead, she BREAKS OUT. And beats the crap out of both of them. But then Ward breaks her leg (I assume) and they tie her up, get a gun triggered for when the door opens, and lures Hunter (who was on the case already with May) to her.

May, Hunter, and some other SHIELD agents locate her and, with some trickery, manage to lure Agent 33 out. She thinks she’s going to get the upper hand and puts on May’s face. Without even a hello, Ward shoots her a bazillion times until she’s dead. And then he realizes the terrible mistake he’s made. Womp womp.

When Hunter finds Bobbi and opens the door, she throws herself–still tied to a chair–in front of the bullet meant for his head, taking it in her back. Awww. She sacrificed herself for Hunter. Babies. <3 But she’s okay, so that’s good.

Back on the SHIELD 2.0 boat, Jiaying is taking over. She wants to infect the WHOLE WORLD with her crazy terrigen crystals to kill off everyone who isn’t a potential Inhuman, while also taking back their weird melty rock in the basement of the boat. Mack gets Skye out of the brig and the two of them battle it out against the wayward Inhumans. Coulson, Fitz, and Cal arrive on the boat; Cal goes to deal with his wifey and Coulson heads to the basement. Fitz has derived a way to trap Gordon in one space, and he, Coulson, and Mack battle it out with him. The writers are evil and make us think that Gordon stabbed Fitz, but Fitz actually stabbed him! But as he falls to his death, he drops a terrigen crystal. Coulson dives to grab it to prevent it from exploding and killing everyone in the room, but the moment he touches it, his arm starts to crystallize….

AND THEN MACK CHOPS COULSON’S FRIGGEN ARM OFF!! AHhhhhhhhHAHahakahkjshgjsldkj!

I screamed super loud. If you couldn’t tell.

Meanwhile, a family reunion is happening on the top of the ship where Skye is trying to stop a quinjet from spreading the terrigen crystals to the rest of the world. Jiaying realizes she can’t convince her daughter that SHIELD is bad, so she starts sucking the life out of her. Skye, in turn, taps into her powers and pushes the jet into the ocean, then starts sucking the life out of her mom right back. “It’s a whole sucking thing,” as Buffy would say. Cal intervenes and the family reunion turns sour as he then squeezes the life out of mommy dearest, breaking her body until she is finally dead. Without a life provided to her to restore her health, that’s the end of Jiaying.

At least Skye and Cal get to have a proper goodbye, complete with a hug that totally didn’t make me cry. Nope, not at all. She promises to visit him and give him “the best day ever.” But his best day ever? The day she was born. Oh god, is that dust in my eye again?

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The next time we see Cal, he’s a different man. He runs a veterinary clinic and doesn’t even recognize his Daisy, but loves her name. The moment he said “magical place,” we all knew his fate. Although it’s sad that Cal has been TAHITI’d, Skye appreciates that they didn’t just lock him up and throw away the key. This way, she can still see him. But Coulson has a very important mission: he wants her to run her own division of SHIELD full of powered people! OoooOooH! Maybe Lincoln will join? And Deathlok?

And if all this wasn’t painful enough, we had to endure watching Fitz and Simmons make plans for a date, only to have Simmons be sucked into the Inhumans melty rock! So rude, AoS writers.

Auuuugh, I can’t wait for next season! I’m assuming Jemma got teleported to some Inhuman world or is just part of the rock thing now. Who knows. But we do know she is part of next season, so she’s not gone for good.

Other things:

  • Skye: She just killed them. All of them. Didn’t even think about it.
    Mack: Yeah, I thought *my* mom was bad when she started watching Fox News.
  • Mack called Gorden “No-Eyes” and that made me happy since I always say, “Good ol’ No-Eyes”
  • “Science, BIATCH!”
  • The moment Jemma mentioned what happened underwater last season, I thought one of them was done for. Which is why the Gordon stabbing was 10x eviler than it should have been. And why the end was even meaner. Damn you, Whedons!
  • “Tell me you figured out what drugs Cal took because my gut’s saying, ‘Everything ever made.’”
  • Seems like Ward will be the main villain for next season… Hmmm! I wonder if redemption is still out of the question? :( I just loved when they were all back together.
  • I guess people are going to be getting sick (how much terrigen crystal does it take to kill someone?) and superpowers all over the world after taking their vitamins? Lol. Maybe I should start taking Fish Oil.
  • Netflix is adding season 2 on June 11! You can relive all of this so soon! Or catch up if you’re behind.

Stephanie Watches Game of Thrones: 5×06 “Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken”

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I’ve never had to cover my eyes while watching. I’ve never felt too uncomfortable watching. Until last night’s episode. They crossed the line. I know they are known for doing outrageous things that go against the book, killing off people still alive, etc. That’s fine. But when you subject an innocent character to torture that she never needed to experience, I can’t even fathom what the writers are thinking.

Sansa Stark has been stuck with awful people since King Robert Baratheon made his journey to Winterfell. She’d been tortured by Joffrey, manipulated by Cersei, Littlefinger, and the Tyrells, stuck in a marriage and a place that killed half of her family. And when she finally gets out? She is put in an even worse situation. Sure, she’s home in Winterfell. But now she’s married to someone I’ve always thought of as worse than Joffrey. Ramsay Bolton, who tortures and flays people for fun. Who sends girls who displease him off into the woods to hunt and then names his dogs after whoever they killed.

Despite all that Sansa has been through on the show, she always fights back, she always bounces back. She’s endured more than anyone. But in that final scene of the episode, she endured more than she ever needed to.

The writers of the show decided that Sansa should be wed to Ramsay Bolton, which I was already furious about. And since he is such a cruel jackass, they decided that he, of all people in the world, needed to take her virtue. Joffrey didn’t even do that, despite his many chances. Tyrion didn’t do that because, even though he can be kind of a dick, he understood that Sansa was still a child. But Sansa’s virtue, the only thing that was still hers, was taken from her in the most violent manner possible.

And what’s worse is that the show made it more about Theon’s pain and Ramsay’s power. I love Theon, I’ve been on his side since the beginning. But that scene should not have been about him. It should have been about Sansa, losing the final piece of all that she holds dear to her. Sure, that whole scene illustrated how awful and cruel Ramsay truly is–because it seemed like the show was forgetting with giving him so much damn screen time last week–but was it necessary? No. In the book, something similar happens to Jeyne Poole. Ramsay commands Reek/Theon to pleasure Jeyne (who Ramsay thinks is Arya Stark) to get her ready for him. That is also obviously awful and gross. And that was more about Theon since Jeyne/Ramsay are not POV characters.

But this should have been about Sansa. Sansa’s struggles came to a head. And I feel ill knowing that this was her fate on the show when in the books she is in a village, eating lemon cakes, has some lady friends, and just danced with a very attractive knight. She’s better off as Alayne. The show should have left her that way.

I know that Show!Sansa will come out of this as strong as ever. And if they have to change anymore, then I would love for her to torture and murder Ramsay and take back her home. Sansa deserves to win the game of thrones and be one of the last people standing. I want the men of the world to stop controlling her. It’s time for her to take a stand and fight back with more than just accepting her fate. She’s learned to play the game and played it well, but she needs to fight back and do more than simply survive. She needs to kill. And she needs to kill Ramsay. That is the only thing I can accept at this point.

Stephanie Watches Game of Thrones: 5×05 “Kill the Boy”

Sansa accurately depicting all viewers during Bolton-heavy scenes.

Sansa accurately depicting all viewers during Bolton-heavy scenes.

Oh good, an episode dominated by the Boltons, Westeros’s most loved family! All I ever wanted was more time with Ramsay, so I could see the beautiful relationship between him and his girlfriend, see him taunt and torture Theon some more, and watch my poor Sansa deal with living with them. Oh joy!

I like Roose and all (mainly because his voice is kind of enchanting…), but ugh, I really don’t need more time with Ramsay. But hey maybe Stannis will come and slaughter him for me!

Speaking of Stannis, he and his family and everyone in his army are off to take Winterfell, while Jon has made a deal with Tormund to go rescue the wildlings from beyond the Wall. Winter is coming (in case you forgot!), which means armies and armies of whitewalkers will be coming too.

Across the Narrow Sea in Mereen, Daenerys is gradually turning in to the Mad King. Granted, her top advisor was killed in an alley by the Sons of the Harpy, so she’s pretty pissed off. And so is everyone who read the books, but yeah. I mean, it’s fine…not like Ser Barristan is still alive, even in the 6th book. Sure, whatever, top swordsman in the world, killed by some lame-os on the street. Yeah, cool. But I’m not bitter.

Anyway, Dany rounds up the leaders of the most powerful families and takes them to see her dragon bbs. She shoves one of them out and in front of the dragons, they roast him alive, and tear him in half (reminded me of that scene in The Lost World Jurassic Park with the two T-Rexes), which was really bloody and awesome. But………. I really don’t think that’s very in character for Dany. I get that she wants to show her power to these people and take revenge for what happened to Barristan, but she also has her dragons locked away because they were eating people! I don’t see her encouraging that behavior, but perhaps I’m wrong. She just seems a little crazier than usual.

After giving it a lot of thought and not wanting to risk any more of her people, Dany decides to re-open the fighting pits for free people and also to marry a high-ranking member of a powerful family. So, she tells Hizdahr she will marry him. It’s always a good idea to marry someone you threatened to feed to your dragons and was also probably ordering the Sons to kill all of your army. He will surely not be bitter.

Jorah and Tyrion are still on their way to Dany. While passing through Valyria, they are attacked by Stone Men–those who have been terribly afflicted by greyscale. Tyrion falls overboard and is pulled down by the stone dudes. BUT Jorah rescues him! Only to have been afflicted with greyscale! Poor dude can’t catch a break.

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Other things:

  • We got to learn a little about maester training from Sam and how he always wanted to be one. Hopefully that will be the first step in Sam’s journey.
  • Sansa got a new dress for dinner and it was very reminiscent of Catelyn’s Winterfell garb, which I appreciated.
  • Maester Aemon is still the cutest lil old man. It makes me sad that he wants to help Dany but he is so far away.
  • Shireen and Davos are also the cutest.
  • Grey Worm and Missandei …now that they’ve kissed…uhhh…Hmm.  He is kind of “ill equipped” for a relationship.